The Unseen Trap of Self Development

We have been programmed to believe that there is something lacking in us, or there is some information or knowledge that we need to obtain before we can live a happy, fulfilled life. That, to be whole, we have to obtain something (craving), or get rid of something (aversion). Craving and aversion are the two components that make up the false sense of self. This drives and perpetuates a sense of lack, separation, and suffering.

Two programs that feed this perpetuation are called Self Development and Law of Attraction. If these programs actually worked for the good of our well being, why is there so much chaos, despair, hate, frustration and hopelessness?

Self development has failed because it has convinced us that we are lacking, we don’t understand, we don’t get it. This is a massive declaration to the universe that we somehow need fixing. Furthermore, these teachings, for the most part, focus on the brain and mind, keeping us locked in the mental plane. This is a form of resistance to what is within us because we are much, much more than our intellect.

When we come from a place where we believe we have to change something because we need healing or we need fixing, all the action we take gives more support to this false premise and the problems we perceive actually become worse.  This is why depression and feelings of suicide are so prevalent throughout society today.

The result of most Law of Attraction teachings are that we become convinced that we need stuff in order to be happy and that has taught us to look outside of ourselves, into the external world, for what we want.

The L of A teachings also focus on the mind and the brain and lead us to believe that our mind has the answers, but the conscious mind doesn’t know how to create.  The universe does not respond to our thoughts or our words. It responds ONLY to the vibration that those thoughts and words create. Science has shown that, at the quantum level, everything is oneness and that like vibration attracts like vibration.

It doesn’t matter how good our Law of Attraction techniques are because the underlying premise is false – that we are lacking in something, and that something is external to us. That is the seed we keep planting (awareness of lack), and that is the fruit we keep reaping (more awareness of lack). We are using the power of the mind to focus on lack, which creates a vibration of lack, which must, therefore, manifest. As a result, we are now experiencing the largest global economic distress since the great depression. Not a coincidence.

So trying to attract, achieve, manifest, etc. is all a form of resistance that is sending a message of I don’t have, I’m not enough, something is missing, something is lacking, something is broken, something is wrong.  So I need to do some more self development work, and I pick up another book, or listen to another presentation, or attend another seminar and the merry go round continues with little lasting change.

What if all of these teachings of Self Development and Law of Attraction we have followed so closely were not true after all, or only partly true? What if there isn’t anything about us that needs to be healed, fixed, or improved? What if we finally understood what it really means that “you create your own experience”?

Science has shown, at the quantum level, that there is just a oneness, a singularity, an undivided whole, a perfect pattern, a perfect beingness that is radiating only pure infinite wholeness.

We need to wake up to that part of us that comes from that perspective. That part of us that has never been damaged or betrayed, abandoned, rejected, diminished, or hurt in any way. That part of us that doesn’t need to be healed, fixed or improved and which, in fact, can’t be improved because each of us is already a masterpiece.

We need to understand we are perfect and have no limitations. This is not a metaphysical trick, but a mystical truth.

We don't need stuff to experience happiness. In actual fact, we need to get happy first to allow all of the stuff to enter our experience. That is what is meant by being in the world but not OF it. When we paint the pictures of our desires on the world, from the heart rather than the head, and do it from a place that "I am already whole and complete", then the "stuff" can appear for our enjoyment and comfort, rather than to fulfill us at some level.

So most conventional L of A teachings are fundamentally incomplete because at the quantum level we are, already, everything we desire. Contrary to what we have been taught, it is not up to us to make it happen by attracting it to us, we can only make it welcome which allows it to emerge through us into this reality.

Until next time,

Sharon.

Lower, Middle, and Higher Self

Thanks to a Group Coaching subscriber for this very insightful response after the August 5 call:

"I did listen to the call last night on my phone.  I was particularly interested in the discussion of the subconscious (lower self), middle, and higher self parts of our consciousness.  I am guessing that the lower self is another way of looking at the reptilian part of our brain.  After giving it some thought after the call, I connected any kind of addictive or compulsive behavior to the Lower Self.  What I didn't understand until now is that by focusing on the fact of "where" the compulsiveness comes from and how to "shut it down" is something that IS controllable by just giving it a moment's focus (or more, if necessary :-) ) and elevating those thoughts to the Higher Self.  I will experiment with that for the next few days and report on my findings.  I am guilty of some personal habits that could stand a bit of re-vision.

Another way for me to look at it would be to say to myself that those behaviors exist in 3-D only, and shift my perception to the 5-D.  But I like Sharon's idea and I'm going to try it, too.

Til next week.  Big thanks to you and Sharon!"

Sharon's response:

Thanks so much for your comments, they are brilliant. I am really excited you will be a part of our call. 

Addictions, compulsive behaviors and habits are anchored in the lower self consciousness and are usually responses to underlying feelings of anxiety. Our brain is a processor of information and stores the data of what we experience. The reptilian part of the brain is what processes our basic survival needs and body function. The limbic brain records experiences and memories so is connected to emotions. Our lower self consciousness is what gives the experiences meaning or perception which determines the relationship between the experiences and emotion. This information is then stored in the brain to be recalled when necessary.

One of the first steps in dealing with these types of issues is to not feel guilt or have any resistance to the behaviors. Guilt comes from believing you are doing something wrong and that is a societal judgment. You may choose to change the habit but first just perceive it as a neutral experience. In most cases it is guilt from, what appears to be unrelated past experiences, that is causing the unwanted behavior. Rather than trying to shut down the behavior, we embrace it for what it is communicating to us, and allow it to release. All thoughts, feelings, emotions, behaviors and habits are a road map to discovering why the lower self is acting out in this way. That part of our consciousness is what drives almost 100% of our decisions. It is very rigid because it is responsible for survival and so will do anything to protect us from feeling anxiety or being wounded again. So when we try to push it away or resist what it is doing, it will become even more powerful.

When you are connecting with your Higher Self include how you are feeling with the thoughts. Consciousness only responds to the language of vibration so we must connect beyond just the mental plane. The feelings that come up when you focus on your habits should connect to the experiences your lower self is responding to, and it will communicate those to your middle self consciousness. These will be the core issues behind why the habits were formed. Releasing the emotional trigger from those past experiences is what allows us to have control over our choices and decisions. This isn't always as easy as it sounds as we are inside the lower self "box" and that part of us does not reason and typically doesn't want to let go of being the protector. My private practice is based on connecting the dots and releasing the triggers to past trauma. Also, even though the behaviors are driven by the lower self, all levels of our consciousness are multi dimensional. So communicating with the lower self can open the door to allowing that part of our consciousness to connect to our higher self, which brings all levels of our consciousness into alignment with 5D vibrational frequencies.

I am very excited to hear your experiences.
Much love and many blessings,

Sharon

Action Does Not Create

This post is in response to a client's question about budgeting. Here are some excerpts from her question:

"…by budgeting and watching every penny and saving for a rainy day, that would be considered tapping into a limited conscious belief system; right? …I might have been able to step into my passion by now if I had been more frugal, more uptight, less carefree but I don't know that for sure and life would have been a lot less fun and enjoyable. I am a free spirit, and I want to live like one, but I also don't want to eat cat food… well, you know."

In this third dimension, we use money as an exchange of energy. All energy is consciousness so the key is to not look at money as an inanimate object but as consciousness you want to have a positive relationship with. Money has become the symbol of who we are, and not having it, threatens our survival and/or wellbeing.  We look for ways to get it, do jobs we don’t like, stay in unhealthy relationships, etc. because we have been programmed to depend on money, and not our own creator selves, to experience this dimension. We have become “stalkers” of money.

All the responsibility we have put on money to deliver what we want has created so much fear around money energy, because we have a distorted relationship with who we really are and how the universe actually works. The universe knows what is needed in this dimension to support humanity. When we put our attention on what we choose to experience and use every activity as the “bridge” to have more of that, we move into our hearts. Anything that we need to support that experience, including money, will be delivered effortlessly.

Everything in this dimension is in relationship to everything else. You could never live your passion by taking action to create or retain more money, such as being frugal, because you are vibrating limitation in the act of being frugal. The frequency of passion is not congruent with the frequency of limitation.

We need to stand back and look at the mind control. Having a budget is not the problem, letting the budget control your experience is the problem. You can budget with the intention that your account will continue to grow every day, regardless of how you spend. But if spending brings on guilt or fear, rather than truly vibrating freedom, then it won’t work. It is about how you feel which = your vibration that is the message you send to the universal unlimited potential. Unlimited potential and possibility simply responds to what you vibrate and it is the hidden beliefs that dominate – regardless of what you choose consciously.

Action does not create anything. Period. It is the intention behind the action that allows everything we want, anytime we want it, but the subconscious intention must be in alignment with conscious intention, as you only receive what your belief system says you can have. Therefore, as an example, you cannot live as a free spirit, when you don’t feel freedom in your job. Until we understand, at a conscious level, when we are on the mental plane rather than heart soul centered awareness, we remain in the 3D prison.

Until next time,

Sharon.

Law of Attraction

Thanks to a listener on the Group Coaching call for emailing this suggestion:

"I would appreciate hearing your opinion of The Law of Attractions. I have appreciated and practiced the teachings of Abraham Hicks and I believe it has been helpful in my life but I've not yet experienced the financial abundance I desire."

This is a great topic as it has been a point of confusion for many of us over the last 20 - 30 years.

Research shows that less than 3% of people who practice the Law Of Attraction traditional teachings have any meaningful results. One of the main reasons is that the techniques that are taught keep people on the mental plane, depending on the 5 senses to connect with what they want. The information contained in most books on the Law of Attraction does not make clear what the steps are to manifest or attract, nor does it cover what "alignment" really means.

In 3D we carry around a lot of stuff that was never true, and had little to do with us, if anything at all. It was handed down as others' beliefs or we experienced their negativity and took it on as "there is something wrong with me". Most of this programming is held in the subconscious and we are not aware of how it is playing out - but we experience lack or turmoil somewhere in our life. We keep looking into our past and hoping it doesn’t happen again in our future.

Manifesting what we want in this reality works, however the universe does not  respond to asking from your words, it only responds to vibration in your combined emotional, mental and physical states. It will continue to give you what you are vibrationally asking for which usually contradicts what you want. So the question is what am I vibrationally asking for that I am not aware of at a deeper level? Because, on a conscious level, I know what I want and it isn't here.

One of the first things to look at is how much of your life is structured around good, bad, right, wrong, should and shouldn’t? This polarization and contrast of the 3rd dimension keeps our vibration in a density below the frequency of creation. It is 5D frequency where what you want already exists. That is what Abraham refers to in the 3 step process: 1. Ask, 2. It is created (not your job) and 3. Allow.

The first two steps are easy but the allowing part is where alignment comes in. We are taught to connect emotionally with the thing we want to experience but that alone does not allow our desire to manifest in our physical reality. Our intention has already created our desire. The allowing of it, to manifest physically, is about aligning our mental, emotional and physical bodies with the vibration of creation. When we give our attention to that which connects us to the frequency of love, appreciation and gratitude, we are allowing. It is not necessary to continually focus on our desires as staying in aligned vibration automatically draws to us that which we created with our intention. This is where awareness plays a big role.

When all levels of consciousness are in alignment in the 3rd dimension, you become the creator in present time, and life emanates from you, within you, through you.  All creation must come THROUGH you, not TO you. When you can hold your vibration in wellbeing, appreciation, or simply being quiet and connecting with yourself, you resonate with the unified field and can stay at that level. You must do this consciously. It is very important that you experience these vibrational frequencies in your physical body as well.

Then at a quantum level you are now expanded into the unified field where you can hold your intention in different dimensions, realms and frequencies. If you focus on the frequency of abundance, through your intention, you can bring that vibrational attention point within the unified field through your body and into this dimension.

There is much more that can be discussed about this topic and I look forward to your sharing your wisdom through your comments, questions, and observations.

Until next time,
Sharon

Money and Our "Wants" vs "Needs"

Thanks to Elin for the following comment on the previous post about our relationship with money.

"My beliefs about $ have always been centred around $ being a tool to be used in a responsible way to sustain the family and help others and, in this way, it continues to flow and the need is met. Now about 'want' is not as clear as it feels selfish and self serving. Can you elaborate on 'want' as opposed to 'need' Sharon? Thank you so much for your inspired blog!"

The first thing to notice is that you mention your “beliefs” around how money should be used. When the origin of beliefs are explored we find most of them are based on false premises and are simply someone else’s opinion. So when we use these programmed beliefs to drive our decisions we are always using other people’s opinions as to how we should live. This causes us to stay in the mental plane around money rather than connecting with the energy of money through our heart.

When we have a belief that we should be responsible with money, which is also tied to you using money to help others, there is usually an element of guilt that comes with spending money on things your heart desires for yourself. Making decisions around money from the belief systems held in the mental state, as opposed to the heart which calls for using money as a means of exchange to experience the things that bring us joy and fun, limits the flow of money into our lives because we hold ourselves back from fully expressing our desires.

We have been programmed to believe that money is separate from us and that we have to work for, or in some way earn, our right to have money. Only if we have worked hard enough can we allow ourselves to use any of it for our enjoyment. That is what the concept of retirement is about.

This leads to the question of “want” as opposed to “need”. Once again it depends on your connection with the energy of money. If you come from the programmed mental belief state about money, you will only allow that which you perceive you need. Then wanting something for the sheer enjoyment of it creates guilt because we also believe that if someone else is miserable (doesn’t have money) we are also not allowed to be happy.

When you call something forward into your life, by using money as an exchange, the words you use are not relevant. It is the vibration attached to the words that determines how the universe responds. One person’s need can be another’s want, and somebody else’s want can be another’s need. It all depends on what meaning you put onto your situation. Remember the language of the universe is vibration and it is how you feel that determines the outcome.

If you can drop all belief systems, which are mainly based on others' opinions or outright lies, and only focus on what makes your heart sing, then you will be a virtual magnet for more money to flow into your experience. From that perspective, you will then see many more opportunities to support others when it feels right, rather than doing so from a sense of responsibility to do it.

Your relationship with the energy of money should feel light, joyful, expectant and fulfilling so that the same resonance flows to you as abundance in every part of your life.